Teutsch on Dating II

RULES AND REGULATIONS

It seems a lot of girls are breaking up with their boyfriends these days. How do you know when it's time to call it quits? As a public service, I will now answer this question. If you meet 3 out of the following 7 criteria, it may be time to dust off that lasso and rope in a new steer:

1. Your girlfriend "accidentally" had sex with a monkey.



2. That monkey happened to be your "cousin."



3. You discovered your ex-boyfriend stuck in the chimney, wedged by the fur of his gorilla costume.



4. Your boyfriend came home with the complete lyrics to Raghav in the Straw tattooed on his forehead.



5. Your chinchilla has a new haircut and suddenly takes to baking banana bread pudding in the morning.



6. Your bathtub drain is consistently clogged with furballs weighing exactly 2 kilograms.



7. You wake up in the morning dressed in a gorilla costume, with your weiner unexplainably stuck in a shoehorn. (That never happened to me, by the way)

And how do you know when to get back together? I'll let Flora take it from here.